| Procrastination! |
[Oct. 9th, 2008|09:32 am] |
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I am procrastinating right now. Today is my first radio show and tomorrow is a huge Test in Precal. Ya Im way behind in Math and have to take PreCal. But I am finally understanding it after studying most of the night last night. Nick has been staying with AShley and I which has been a lifesaver. I love having him here, and when he leaves I know Im going to be feeling a bit down. But he said he will at least be back up for Halloween so that means I can focus on my work. I get my license back Nov. 1st and Im way excited even thought my car needs like $500 in repairs. Im kinda sick but Im keeping it on the dl even thought I nearly shit myself today in Precal because it was the end of class and she just would NOT STOP TALKING. I had to go so bad I was screaming in my head "GO GO GO GO!" Well other than that life is pretty awesome. My room is the most comfortable place in the world and I never want to leave half the time. I like living with Ashley and we had a good time celebrating her Bday. Im pretty stupid when it comes to understanding her though and she seems to be the same way with me. So it can get strange at times. Nick being around helps a lot. I hope he finds someone who doesnt treat him like shit. So back to HW because I have statistics in 15 minutes and Im trying to get the weekends hw done before I go to class so I can concentrate on PreCal. Then I also have a German exam on Monday that is big and I also got my own show on the radio show which I already mentioned called DJ Sly Spy and Ty Dy. The whole emphasis is on good music and light political and philosophical bantering like all college radio shows. Unfortuneately the show we want to have is a Specialty show so we have to do a Semester of DJing the Jet Set (preapproved music mixed in with our own) Life is good im trying not to waste it. I love school but it feels like im not experiencing much. There is so much to do and so little time but for now studying will consume my life. Perhaps it won't be long before I update again and perhaps not. All I know is that I need this double shot canned espresso that reminds me so much of the coffee in vending machines in Japan. ONLY 5-6 weeks before the cold weather rolls in and I can resume floating on snow 24/7 YAY |
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| Farming Strikes back |
[May. 8th, 2008|09:38 pm] |
The past 2 days have been a blast. I recruited my friend Tyler to come and stay with me for help with the barn and stuff. So every morning we get off of work and come here and farm and then go to sleep and then farm some more and then return to work. We have been mixing some drinks, and working hard. We recently realized that carrots can easily sway how a horse thinks of you, and catching chickens requires both strategy and skill. Tomorrow Im on my own, and then Saturday Im going to see Funny Money. We will see how things go. At least the milking goat comes when I call her now.
peace
-neal |
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| Cinco De Mayo! |
[May. 5th, 2008|11:35 am] |
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So for the 5th of May I decided to have a friend over for drinks and farming, so we came home from work, drank a Mojito, made kaluah and coffee, and went to work milking goats with a beer in our hands. At 150 pounds I was rather drunk and we had much fun trying to coordinate a goat capture, running drunk through a field, just having a blast. Then after all the chores were done, we went for a hike which ended up as running through a field of wheat right before harvest. and then continuing back on the trail to another beer, and fresh eggs, with toast, bacon and a cheddar wurst. Afterward we just kind of sang Bob Marley tunes, took showers and am going to bed right now. Overall Cinco De Mayo rocks. Bo to bed. Another workday tomorrow. |
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| Harvest Moon |
[May. 4th, 2008|09:30 am] |
Harvest Moon is my new life as of yesterday morning. I began it by coming home at 7AM from work, and going my room, changing and then running to the barn. I milked the goat Skye, who gave me three gallons of goat milk, which now one of my favorite milks, as it is good for anyone who is lactose intolerant (Heydn Ericson) and the cheese is awesome and not difficult to make. I gave the 4 cups of milk to the two kids (baby goats) and then proceeded to capture the chickens through a clever ploy involving placing food in their coop leaving the door open, watching them walk in, and closing the doors to trap all of them except three whom I tried to pull a Link and run around catching them, which proved not so easy, and left me very disappointed when I noticed I could not glide by raising them above my head and jumping from high places as I previously was led to believe by an awesome video game. I gathered chicken and duck eggs, fixed the electric fence, and then fed the horses. I got along with all the animals but they seemed curious about me.
Then I decided to enjoy the labors and ate three chicken eggs, a bunch of bacon and a wonderful concoction of Kahluah goat milk and coffee, that was awesome. And then I ran three miles around the property came back had a glass of wine and took a long hot shower in the outdoor shower, and went to bed. AWESOME DAY.
Today was different however. All the animals whose curiosity of me seemed to make them tolerant of me then was now gone. The goat ran like hell at the site of me and led me into a 15 minute chase in which I slid through the mud and dewy grass trying to catch the damn goat whose teets were so full they were squirting milk with each step. Finally I caught her milked her and proceeded to feed the horses who couldn't give a shit who I as as long as I had food. I tried the same trick with the chickens but they all escaped but they should be okay for a while. I got the eggs, fed the baby goats which is my favorite part of the day because there is something wonderful about seeing the little creatures so happy to see you and drink from the bottle, Its an amazing feeling. So after all of that I was exhausted so I came in wrote this and am now going to bed, I will update again soon. I love being a farmer. |
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| Christmas n shit. |
[Dec. 26th, 2007|09:33 pm] |
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So Christmas was fun, I had to work. New job is cool. I talk to girls, look at snowboards all day, and then go snowboarding on breaks, as well as snowboarding before or after work. I eat well, have gained 4 pounds back of the 50 I lost, am taking care of myself for the first time in forever, and I work out. I feel good, Im tired from working out all the time, and Im mentally exhausted from German when I get home, but the food is great and the family is great. I love my Oma and Opa. Its weird having people take care of me again. I feel kinda useless. My car is a piece of shit but it got me here, and other than that it is abhorringly lonely. I don't know anybody, don't talk to anybody and there isn't much to do here but self improve, which is what I do. Diana is the exception but since I have been working (my hours are killer) I dont get to see her much. Anyways I have to finish this chapter in German tonight. |
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| shit Job |
[Dec. 7th, 2007|12:55 pm] |
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So I know you think this is going to be a post about my shitty job at Penn Station. No. Its a post about me taking a shit and then getting a job. I woke up this morning, and my bowels said Bathroom now, as I missed my regular 3AM shit last night. lol TMI I know. Anyways it was going well when I recieve a phone call. Now usualy I would leave it but today I thought what if it is about my car? So I put shittig on pause grabbed the phone and returned to the pot only to discover that I had gotten the job I wanted at Whitetail servicing boards, which means I can make money, and FREE SNOWBOARDING! |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 7th, 2007|05:52 am] |
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My biggest fear is being alone, but I want to face it. |
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| Brown and Black Forum Review |
[Dec. 6th, 2007|06:21 pm] |
I just finished watching the Brown and Black Forum, and here are my thoughts.
Affirmative Action is Stupid Shit, and not just because it doesn't help me, but because it doesn't help anyone.
I am truly excited about the talks on Education Reform. I can only pray and wish and vote to get my college education because Lord knows I'm having a hard time affording it. I just want to go to school! Damn the institution for making it unaffordable. This forum has given me so much hope but I really didn't like Edwards in it, and Kucinich kinda dropped the ball a little bit, with his tussle with Biden, but hey shit happens, but you still have time to recover before the big vote.
Barack said some down to earth things, but I always feel as if hes just a bit scared of Hillary. The little Obama Biden party at the end of that was pretty crappy but easily overlooked. So heres how I grade the candidates.
1. Biden I think gets the high grade for the forum with a fashionably late entrance, a hard stab at the issues, and an aggressive manner A-
2. Obama- Great appealing to the common man, but somewhat dropped the ball on the candidate candidate question. B+
Clinton- Great presence, but Im knowledgeable of your crafty ways witch. Your stance on healthcare, or skirt around it I should say gives you the lower grade in the forum with a C-
Kucinich I like what you have to say but you need some more hard numbers in your speeches and calm down a bit bucko. I know you're excited but not too aggresive for you. I dont want another Howard Dean deal. B
Chris Dodd- way too angry, and way too douchey in my opinion. I don't like your opinions and I don't like the stupid tangents. D
Bill Richardson- Another Race Card please. I know its the brown and black Forum but come on! Dick. F
Some of my opinions not all. only the ones Im really really thinking about right now. However all the candidates did well when talking about Education and speaking of doing things well. Hail the homeland! Praise All Around for Germany's clean energy movement! Damn fine work to repair your dirty dirty pollution reputation. http://www.thedailygreen.com/environmental-news/latest/bali-germany-47120602 |
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| I love this song. |
[Dec. 5th, 2007|12:54 am] |
Say, my love, I came to you
With best intentions
You laid down and gave to me just what
Im seeking
Love, you drive me to distraction
Hey my love do you believe that we
Might last a thousand years
Or more if not for this?
Our flesh and blood it ties
You and me right up
Tie me down
Celebrate we will
Because life is short but sweet for certain
Were climbing two by two
To be sure these days continue,
These things we cannot change
Hey, my love, you came to me like
Wine comes to this mouth
Grown tired of water all the time
You quench my heart and you
Quench my mind
Celebrate we will
Because life is short but sweet for certain
Were climbing two by two
To be sure these days continue,
The things we cannot
Celebrate, you and me, climbing
Two by two, to be sure
These days continue, things we cannot change
Oh, my love, I came to you
With best intentions
You laid down and gave to me just what
Im seeking
Celebrate we will
Because life is short but sweet for certain
Were climbing two by two
To be sure these days continue,
Things we cannot change...
Things we cannot change |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 4th, 2007|04:32 pm] |
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Ok so now I moving on the 15th instead. I'm kinda stressed now that the move has been pushed up at the last minute but I should be able to manage it. I'm exhausted from working both jobs all the time, plus my room mate once again did not pay rent. I find myself actually despising him as a person. Not Dale but Preston. He does not take any responsibility and when you confront him its like talking to a wall. And I'm just glad I wont have to deal with him. Plus I know some things that are really just inhuman about him but those aren't for me to divulge. Anyways all in all Im REALLY frustrated and somewhat stressed, but I just can look forward to a long holiday with my family, snowboarding, sleep, food, and thats about it. Other than that Im selling all my shit, and packing what little I have. Goodbye TN its been a decent trip and I dont hate you, but I certainly don't want to stay here. I need to go to New Zealand. There I can live my private life. Maybe if I get through college I can go work over there. |
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| Ron Paul |
[Nov. 30th, 2007|02:49 pm] |
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Ron Paul has made it very easy for me. He has said he will not run as a third party candidate if he does not get the republican nomination. I only wish he would make an addendum to that saying "unless Hillary gets the Democratic nomination." but he wont. This way I dont have to choose between Ron Paul and Barack Obama. Ive been researching Austrian School economics and it is AWESOME! |
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| Taking a stand |
[Nov. 19th, 2007|02:44 pm] |
To whom it may concern,
As a Murfreesboro resident and believer in fair enforcement of the law, it has come to my attention that the Murfreesboro Police Department uses Tasers. I have calledd Sergeant Walker to attain more information about the type of Tasers used and he has not yet responded. However, through recent studies I have discovered that Tasers are indeed lethal torture devices and are not fit to be used under any circumstance in the enforcement of the law. All studies reported by Taser inc. the leading producer of Taser products have been conducted by corporate paid scientists using a pig and 4 dogs in 1999. THese test results were not published in a scientific journal nor were they reviewed by their peers. Due to the rising number of tase-deaths recently, (most not involving drugs or alcohol) I believe as well as many of my voting age friends that Tasers should not be used by Murfreesboro Police department to prevent any potentially embarrassing and possibly costly issues with Rutherford county, or TN gov't. Please consider my request or respond with your opinion as to why Tasers should be used, even though time and again they are being proven to be lethal. Also, if they are deadly to anyone under the influence, (a fact an officer cannot always and usually does not know) then it should be considered an attempt to murder. Tasers are unsafe for our streets and I strongly recommend they be removed. If you would like to see some proof I have made a list of sources that show that Tasers are unsafe for use.
1. http://thegallopingbeaver.blogspot.com/2007/11/taser-international-is-outraged.html
Also includes several references on the site including disputing Taser(r) press release which was very inaccurate and basically a blatant lie to save the face of the company.
2. http://www.breitbart.tv/?p=8080
A video showing a Taser caused death. Warning: very graphic
3. http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-1964707186772642906
Another Police Tasing murder.
4. http://www.corpwatch.org/article.php?id=12455
5. http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/11/19/taser.death/index.html
Front Page CNN news report today involving death of a 20 yr old male.
6. http://www.time.com/time/nation/article/0,8599,1678641,00.html?xid=feed-cnn-topics
A Time article on the excessive use of Tasers
7. http://money.cnn.com/2005/02/11/news/midcaps/taser/index.htm
A CNN article stating that a Taser Inc. taser DID CAUSE the death of a 14 year old chicago male.
In conclusion, Tasers, if not deadly, are at least torture devices which when defined by the dictionary it says:
Torture-
1.the act of inflicting excruciating pain, as punishment or revenge, as a means of getting a confession or information, or for sheer cruelty.
2. a method of inflicting such pain.
4. extreme anguish of body or mind; agony.
7. to afflict with severe pain of body or mind: My back is torturing me.
US law states in 18 U.S.C. ยง 2340A (http://caselaw.lp.findlaw.com/casecode/uscodes/18/parts/i/chapters/113c/sections/section_2340a.html)
that torture is:
1. "Torture" means an act committed by a person acting under the color of law specifically intended to inflict severe physical or mental pain or suffering (other than pain or suffering incidental to lawful sanctions) upon another person within his custody or physical control;
2. "Severe mental pain or suffering" means the prolonged mental harm caused by or resulting from -
1. the intentional infliction or threatened infliction of severe physical pain or suffering;
2. the administration or application, or threatened administration or application, of mind-altering substances or other procedures calculated to disrupt profoundly the senses or the personality;
3. the threat of imminent death; or
4. the threat that another person will imminently be subjected to death, severe physical pain or suffering, or the administration or application of mindaltering substances or other procedures calculated to disrupt profoundly the senses or personality..
All of which are done by Tasers.
I am calling for immediate action for Murfreesboro to be the first city in TN to think progressively enough to know that Tasers are lethal, torturous weapons and have them removed from law enforcement and replaced with a less lethal, disabling equipment such as Pepper spray, or the newer more improved pepper spray Freeze plus P which is cheaper than tasers and not lethal.
For more information on Freeze plus P, please see (http://www.nafeco.com/ProductDetails.aspx?ProductID=FREEZEPLUS-P-4)
Please consider my request seriously as this is a VERY IMPORTANT ISSUE.
Sincerely,
Neal Ryder |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 18th, 2007|03:13 pm] |
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This is my life, and it is ending one minute at a time. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 18th, 2007|04:08 am] |
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I was honest. I tried. I might as well face the fact that I am allergic to love and I have shit to do that cant involve anyone else. Im just one of those people that should never ever be in a relationship and probably never will. This may sound like a sad pity party, and the truth is I am sad, but I also understand that I have a lot of stuff to do in TN in a very short period of time. I need to get to work. 33 days until I move. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 15th, 2007|02:29 pm] |
First, watch this video. DISCLAIMER: MAN BEING KILLED BY POLICE OFFICERS
http://www.breitbart.tv/?p=8080
Ok now. Tasers are a lethal weapon. Anyone who doesnt think so is not facing the facts. TAsers have an incredible capability to kill anyone under the right circumstances, most of which, are not or can not be known to officers or civilians with these weapons. Its amazing to me how officers seem to jump at the chance to tase a civilian. At least if we are going to respond to any official threat with this type of force it might as well be cheap ass 9mm bullets. This is sickening and I am fully prepared and willing to defend myself against this corrupt sick police force that exists today. That being said, not all cops are part of this, but a large number of them are, and as a civilian know that it is my responsibility as it is yours to defend our fellow civilians should we ever see one of these situations. Only through unity can you ever overcome this type of corruption. |
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| Galaxy |
[Nov. 13th, 2007|11:30 pm] |
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Super Mario Galaxy is Awesome! |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 11th, 2007|07:16 pm] |
Well once again Im in that state of mind where Im frustrated. The situation has not changed with the girl Riki-Lynne, who is very awesome, but I do know for sure that nothing will stop me, not love, hate, or family. I have to do this. Heydn is right I have to go on this journey.
However, I am sad that things arent working out between us. She graduates in May and is going to Singapore and I need to go to PA. She will be back here for grad school and I can return to visit. I haven't told her how I feel but I wear my emotions on my sleeve all the time, so it doesn't really matter. 34 days left. I want to see her a few more times before I leave. We will see if it works out. Having two jobs is getting easier, but it is still difficult.
THe political situation that used to make me nervous or angry is now to the point that I am constantly looking over my shoulder, checking digg for the next terrorist attack. Im just waiting. I know the Bush administration will probably attempt another terrorist attack on America to force us into a war with Iran or it will happen of its own accord. So Im starting to get edgy.
Im doing this Lucid dreaming thing with my computer that is having very interesting results, and I feel as if mentally I am moving in leaps and bounds to places I never thought I would get to. Im spending less time on the internet, more time reading, and I haven't watched TV (other than the office on NBC.com) for a long long time.
I got a membership to Audible as well, thanks to Leo Laporte telling his listeners about it quite a while back. I jsut downloaded Wicked and Crime and Punishment (def. looking forward to that one) and I am still reading Faust, which is unbelievable Poetry. I wish I could write that well. Im still writing poetry but dont have as much time with all the reading, sleeping, and meditation.
Also Ive been trying to brush up on my guitar. We will see how that goes.
I have 5 weeks. Lets see how awesome I can make them. |
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| Forced Failure |
[Nov. 7th, 2007|02:04 am] |
In the end what makes failure? I feel ripped in two directions. One is irrational, impossible, beautiful, and wonderful and the other is responsible, necessary, yet sad. I know which one I should take, and I know which one I will take but Im sad for the fact that I cant be the one to live that other life. Sometimes to see the possibilities and to raise potential, you must fail. I feel like a failure. I have failed to follow an insanely irrational beautiful dream that feels right. And all I feel is sad about my decision. I feel as if I may be failing. Does predestination exist? My feelings come from the soul but I don't know where the majority of them go. Does God want me to be irrational? I understand that may be but there is always hope even though it is next to impossible. I dream and it is beautiful, but is it real? I cant stay there and I cant stay here. I am torn in two. If only I had made some different decisions perhaps the other reality could have been possible, but now it is not realistic, so I fail. And I am sad at my failure, which is my right, excited for my future but disappointed at the note on the side that seems to read, you will be alone. You must be alone. Its not a choice anymore. I must fail. I have to fail this circumstance, no matter what I want otherwise. I just wish sometimes I could bear myself in all purity before the world and not get torn to shreds, but humans are meant to wear masks in societies. It is only in the lonesome when there is no one but you and god that there is ultimate truth. He knows what Im giving up, he has lived it, felt it, and knows. I only wish that sometimes that I could return the favor or ask him to take it back. I am meant to pay for my mistakes, not him. I embrace the scientific mind, of self truth, understanding obligations, responsibility, necessity, and extinguish the firey passion that is the side of dreams, beauty, art, love, and worship. Which life was I supposed to lead? I will recover from this failure as I do all others, and I will be happy either way, but in very different ways. Both are life dreams, and pure ideas, but one is dependent on variables that are uncontrollable and the other changes all those to controls. Both paths are marches through fire; one goes in and one goes out of a burning room. I know I must leave but I want to go back in.
So what does this mean? I met a girl. Shes intelligent, beautiful, kind and loving, but Im starting to suspect that every man she meets falls for her, and I may just be another one. I have no idea how she feels, only that she is kind and loving and I really really like her but I must go to PA, and I cannot give up my calling.And it sucks because she seems perfect. Fuck. |
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